Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Work, work, work

I am so happy for the return of My Life Monday...


I have had many jobs over the years. Some of them have been very memorable, but I would have to say that the best story comes from my first job.

Ok I blame it on my parents for not preparing me better for the real world (no way is it my fault), because when I graduated from high school I had never had a job before, and I finally realized that I needed one. So I started looking it was very stressfull and I admit I was a little picky about where I wanted to work...at first, then I started to get desperate. Finally I applied for a job at TJ Maxx, and was hired. Oh I was so proud of myself. So my first day I went to work, we learned about company policies, and other such things, and then it was time for us to learn how to use the cash registers. So there I am standing there at the front of the store listening to how to use the cash register, and I start to think "oh my, I have terrible cramps." Yes of all days aunt flo had chosen this one to show up, so I am standing there trying to listen, to how to ring up a sale when I think to myself, "these cramps are really bad, ouch, ouch they really hurt, oh man am I uncomfortable, I think I will just lay my head down on the counter and rest a minute, hey why is everything all dark and blurry..." A few second later I woke up with several of my new co-workers standing around me. And one very helpful customer shoving a lifesaver into my mouth. Yes I had passed out, now that was embarrassing enough (pretty much I wanted more than anything to find the nearest hole to crawl in and die), but then the lady from the customer service desk yells for everyone to hear, "THEY WANT TO KNOW IF THERE IS ANY WAY SHE COULD BE PREGNANT!"

Huh? who wants to know? Why the 911 people of course, don't worry Nicole, the ambulance is on its way. By now EVERYONE is looking at me, the not so helpful customer is trying to swab my head with a dripping wet paper towel, and I am actually praying that the earth will just open up and swallow me right there on the spot. I try to explain that I am not pregnant I just have cramps. They don't believe me. About then the ambulance shows up. Well to be exact the ambulance, and TWO firetrucks show up, and it must have been a slow day for emergencies, because out of the emergency vehicles streamed every paramedic in town I think. They take me to the back room (thank goodness at least that lady will stop trying to get me to eat candies), one of the paramedics starts yelling questions at me. THis guy is actually yelling at me.

"Hello! I am having a bad enough day with out you yelling at me, and for the last time I am NOT pregnant! I just have cramps! Will somebody please get me an advil."

About then my dad shows up, he is relieved to see me after having to navigate through the ambulance and firetrucks, and paramedics just to get to me. By then the paramedics are realizing that I might really be telling the truth, and are unhappily packing up to leave. I think they are really dissapointed that I am not actually dying or something. I go home, but not to worry the next day I return to work. Yes I was absolutely mortified at what had happened, but I really needed a job, so I had to go back.

I worked there for two months until well,... IT HAPPENED AGAIN! Yes I am standing there at the cash register having bad cramps again and then the next thing I know I wake up on the floor and the customer service lady is asking me AGAIN if I am pregnant. Oh the shame, this time they believe me when I say that I have cramps, and the ambulance is called off, but I decide that I am allergic to working at TJ Maxx and having cramps at the same time, and I quit on the spot. I am hired the next day to work at ZCMI in the Trim the Home department(translation: overpriced Christmas crap). I spend a great deal of time at the cash register and don't pass out once (woohoo!) Although on the days that I have bad cramps I call in sick, just to make sure.

6 comments:

Nettie said...

Wow! What an experience! I have to say the soggy towel,life saver pushing lady made me laugh. You truly are a strong woman, going back to work after such an embarrassing experience!

Anonymous said...

BWAHAHAHAHA!!! This is too funny. I can just picture it in my mind...

Rae said...

I found you VIA Rocks In My Dryer and admire the comment you left on her Moms For Modesty post VERY much. Thank you for your words of wisdom + for being educated with a very rough topic. You might want to check out my latest post. My mom, like you, has worked with victims her whole life. I've done LOTS of volunteering for her office and it's a subject too many people take too lightly.

Your story is priceless too..it's hilarious but aww you poor girl! I wouldn't have the courage you had to go back after any incident like that!

someone else said...

Oh, I remember those kind of cramps. They were so horrible and that awful feeling just before you pass out? Calling in sick was a great idea!

sweetmagnolia said...

Wow, that was a humbling first day. You have a great sense of humor about it now, but I know it definitely wasn't funny when it happened.

It reminds me of a field trip to Birmingham, Alabama, that I took when I was sixteen. Turns out I had a stomach virus. I threw up at the statue of the Vulcan. I was mortified. The teacher thought I was simply homesick since the strip required us to be in Birmingham two days. She would not believe me when I said I wasn't homesick until she caught the stomache virus from me. Oh, well, I made a believer out of her.

Anonymous said...

I love that I know this story. It makes me feel special.